The Wages of Sin is Death

In the Bible, somewhere, states that the wages of sin is death. People sin everyday. I have also been questioned if muslims, mormons, everyone else non-Christains goes to hell. I was feeling dark as I have been increasingly so. Do to extreme excited happy people, loss of once thought close friends, no job, lack of money, boredom, and lack of sleep. Well I was in a mood today and wanted to ask this muslim classmate, well more likely tell him, "It's kind of funny really, you religions says that you can't eat pigs and my religion says that we both are going to hell. Me for being a man and sleeping with me and you for being Muslim." Followed with a good hardy chuckle, for effect.

To add to being angry when people around me are happy. The funny thing is when people are unhappy I become strangely happy. Oddest thing!

I also had a thought. That what if Satan devised a way to use Christianity to make people sad, angry, loss of faith, by making them focus on their sin and hate themselves so much that they forget God is love and he loves them very much. When I was a kid, I remember the God of Christians being a loving God. And now that I am older, He has been introduced as a mighty judge that cannot look upon the sinners and condemns those to hell. Have people forgotten that God is love and to love one another. But how can I even say this when I want to introduce a shovel to people face almost every single day.

In closing I think three things.
1. Being gay is not a choice. I cannot help but glance at a guy and think he is hot, just like a normal guy checks out a girl. I can't stop it. It won't stop!
2. I am going to hell for being gay and that I am unsaveable, but I don't want to go to hell.
3. Love will set us free. But I find it hard to love, the stupid, the retarded, the smelly, the ugly and the boasting. I find them all distasteful. And I find that the people who can't love and think little of people are distasteful. Yes, that is correct, I find myself to be distasteful and disgusting.

I hope I can truly love people some day.